autumn (Oct-2005)

we walked for what seemed like hours, through latent vanilla skies and chocolate sundae sunsets, a subtle harmonisation of colours saturated in love. caramel clouds eluded touch, as each fleeting step felt closer to home. maybe i'll never know what made you reach out towards the sun, a promise long forgotten, or distant dreams of redemption painted by hand. empathy and affinity interlaced like autumn's falling leaves... tomorrow never felt so far away.

RIVER HUNT (2005)

and i never noticed the disappearance of the sun (May-2005)

thursday afternoon, and thoughts followed me around with every concealed step. the sun shone down, as i hypnotically hypothesised the structure of better days. despite the warmth, i held each breath, an act of improbable isolation, i had never felt so alone. perhaps i'll never know why, but that moment transfixed my attention, negating comprehension, a crossword puzzle washed out in the rain as i slipped further away. i hadn't noticed the disappearance of the sun, only the coldness wrapping around me like an empty birthday present, bought out of necessity rather than love. i stood motionless, replaying conversational conversations and russian roulette routines. i had everything, yet indiscriminate amplifications of pain, white-washed the walls of my mind in battleship grey. i have no recollection of how many tears rained down that day, as reddened eyes tell stories never understood.

RIVER HUNT (2005)

and in that moment, i understood (Feb-2005)

four weeks had passed with no hint of reconciliation or compromise, rainbow smiles turned overcast, as the last laugh if the laughter echoed on. we stood their absolutely alone in a state of unmistakable contemplation as rain washed away happier memories, just as we needed them the most. i'll never forget that look of utter desperation embedded deep within your eyes. feelings of separation as my heart seemed to sink further into a dark ocean, improbably magnetised, irrevocably sensitised. perhaps days had passed but time stood frozen, locked safely inside our sacred red box of memories. raindrops hung suspended, as photographs faded past like a valentines slideshow stuck on repeat. i watched on as visual integration with a touch of delicate imagination flickered inscribed keys inside my mind. without thought or hesitation, yet unconsciously understated, i uttered softly the most perfect of words, an instantaneous verbalisation laced with sincerity and undeniable empathy. the movie played on, as teardrops fell onto your warm shoulder, a bond to remain forever unbroken, a bond to withstand the savages of time.

RIVER HUNT (2005)

and she never told me her name.. (Feb-2005)

this is not an end, despite the exhalation of air, i had not done living. temporary asphyxiation on thoughts about thoughts, an indefinite looping refined with each year that passed like a runaway train desperately clinging to a rusted track. i once swore allegiance to a compartmental life, boxed activities and cardboard cut-out friends, an absence of mind and declaration of fate, positively pointless and purposefully destroyed with every step, this time i'm not coming down. it seemed like days, but the seconds remained decidedly suspended and elegantly disused. sand draining through hour-glasses creating patterns in my mind, a spectral illumination, saturated in colour, contrasted with pale hues. i once stopped to think about the words that i wrote, a disintegration of letters and paragraphs revoked. this is not an end, this is a perfect beginning.

RIVER HUNT (2005)